Whew!!! Close Call!!

In an attempt to knock the dust off my dating life, I almost made a HUGE mistake! That's right folks... out with an ex. I know, I know....there's nothing anyone can say that I have not said to myself. I don't know what had gotten into me. Could have been the cobwebs all around my dating life, boredom, I don't know. Needless to say, this little thing I call a blog helped remedy the situation. I don't ever go back and reread what I've wrote. Once it's down on paper, I mean posted on the web, it's there to stay. Here's how it went...

I can't remember which story he was from, which makes this SOOO much more worse (is that possible), but yes, he was a dating post. He found me on FB. Sent me a friend request. I pondered on should I accept the the friend request. I did and BAM I find an email from him and he sends an instant message. I do not know what is going through his head nor mine as a matter of fact. Just casual chatting back and forth then he throws his phone #'s out there. I was not going to call him. He said he had tried to call my house phone but it's disconnected. Yeah, no one called me on it so I didn't see the need for the expense. I remember from dating him that was him giving me his #'s was his way of asking for mine...so with utter regret I gave him my cell. He called and we had a very casual chat for about 30 minutes. Still not sure what's going on.... my curiosity is up...the next day, sees me on FB and chats away and asks if I would like to go out. Mind you this was not on the phone but through chat...1st clue he hasn't changed one single bit. I said sure, yes a glutton for punishment, he throws some things out there. I suggest dinner as I am not going down the same road as before and wanted to talk. He comes back with The Comedy Club-Henry Cho. My thought- I've heard Henry Cho is funny. I can say my peace after the show. Very selfish of me, I know. I would be able to see for myself if he had changed. He then tells me i can call him if I want to the next night. Seriously, I know at this point I'm being an idiot for even talking to him but I'm not going to call him. Told him I had dinner club, which I did. I began feeling very nauseous and wondering how I was going to get out of this. I decided long ago to not live my life with regrets, yet here I am. I do not hear from him until Friday night when I'm on FB. Yep, sends a message, wanting to know if we're still on for Sat. night. With a heavy sigh-yes. Long pause....he comes back and says he read my blog and never mind about going out, that he didn't know he was that bad and he's sorry. I do not know at first how to respond as this is typed words and it can be hard to decipher at times. My response was: that's in the past, I don't know who you are today. He's response. I guess. THEN types- well since I've paid for the tickets I'm big enough of a man to still go if you want, so I'll see you at 7. What? At this moment CLARITY hit me like a ton of bricks! No I'm not ok!! So I said that I wasn't sure if I was as I wasn't sure why after all this time he wanted to see me. His response: I'll sell them or see if I can cancel them. My response: can you answer that? why do you? He went off line at this point.

With my new found clarity I removed him from my friend list and blocked him. I am not the same girl I once was and will start my cat collection to become the crazy old cat lady. I will not go down that road....traveled once before, not again...

In a drought...

Tis the season of the drought. No not the weather but my dating life. Very long dry spell...not sure how long it will continue, hopefully not too much longer. This dry spell makes me the worst blogger out there. I do continue to get offers of setting me up with people but they never seem to pan out. I guess it's a sign. Who knows? I think I might have to change my blog to: What not to wear, sightings of Birmingham. Lately that is the only material I have. Seeing some of the outfits I've seen lately have made me wonder if these people do not have friends or significant others. They should have been stopped before they left the house. Then again I would not have material. I do have some thoughts I'd like to post but they aren't for the faint of heart and only those that get my crude humor would get it. I'd hate to change the opinion people have of me well those I care about. When I do I'll put a warning on it. Personally, I find it very funny but some might not...wait this is my blog, they don't have to read it if they don't want...this is the country of free speech, for now...off my soap box...

Back to the subject at hand. I guess it's time to get back on these dating sites to find some new material. There are certain things I won't do even for a great story. So no dating 60 year old men that have 6 children and want more. ooohhh just thought of another entry...

Look for more humor in this life of a single gal soon...

TLo

why do people make life hard?

Normally I stick to funny happens but this time I just have to vent...  I don't get it.  You help people and help them yet they think that it's appropriate to talk to you any way they want.  I was not raised that way nor will I tolerate being spoken to in that manner.  Then when you call them out on lies...makes them squirm and it always seems to be someone else's fault.  Own up!  We are human and we all screw up, but to not break the cycle and continue doing the same things is well...unacceptable.  As a child you don't have the choice in how you are raised but when you become and adult YOU have to decide am I going to live in the past or am I going to make my life the best it can be.  Why would you not want to?  I do not want my past to define me nor will I let it.  It is exactly that, past.  There is always someone else that has things worse than me.  You have to make the best of the life you have.  Would I have chosen to lose my sister 3 weeks after she gave birth to the child she struggled so long for? NO.  Would I have chosen for my dad to walk into the emergency room one day and be gone the next.  NO.  We are not promised the next breath so make the best of it.  Are there days when all I want to do is cry, absolutely.  Sometimes I do.  Does it mean that I have permission to mope around, woe is me.  NO, I am here for a purpose and a reason  and until my last breath I will LIVE.  I will do my best even if it means owning up to things I have done wrong and saying I'm sorry to people I have hurt.  I don't get people that think the world owes them something.  The world owes you nothing.    I WILL make sure to the best of my ability that the ones I love are taken care of and not make any excuses for doing so nor will I stop.

Whew!  I feel better!

The Flirt

Victim 5-the flirt

The edited version-extended director's uncut is not available at this time.

this one is a doozy and happened a long, long, ok so not that long ago.  A couple of years, give or take.  The flirt.  I met him through work and in my line of work you don’t really meet a lot of people.  It started as innocent flirtin on both parts.  I flirt well over the phone.  Since his company did business with us we’d talk from time to time.  I can’t remember how it happened but eventually we exchanged phone numbers.  I should have ran the other way when he told me he’d been married 3 times and lied about how often he saw his children.  He had 2 boys and didn’t see either one of them.  He told me he saw them once a month but we dated for like 3 months and he NEVER saw them.  That should have been what sent me away.  No I stayed.  Even when I found out his youngest child was conceived during “a weekend of fun.”  Did that scare me off?  No but it should have.  When his soon to be ex showed up at his house when I was there and they were arguing in the yard, I stuck around.  I did question how his ex knew where he lived since he had just moved there.  The story he gave did not jive but at the time I believed him.  It boiled down to the fact that I wouldn’t sleep with him.  I didn’t trust him and with good reason.  When he ended it he moved his new girlfriend in within a week.  Whew....close call.  We went about a year without talking then he emailed and asked how i was doing.  We'd talk every so often and I even went to dinner with him.  I have seen or talked to him in about 4 years.  

I'm so thankful I'm not that same girl... I look back and see that I put up with a lot of crap.  In the words of Lady Antebellum "that girl is long gone"

....so those that know, keep it to yourself...Josh.

oh, what to blog about...

what to say... weather...no, it has given me this glorious headache. 

It's just one of those days where I'd rather be at the beach by the pool or digging my feet in the sand. Instead I'm at work blogging, when I should be working....so I'm starting my weekend early.  My work is done so I'm good.

This week has been crazy free which makes for a boring week.  I hope next week will provide quite the adventure!

I know I need to post more dating stories but have held back on some due to others would know who they are...not that there is many...the well is dry.

Oh, did have a close call Tuesday night.  When leaving Firebirds I almost ran into a guy I had gone out with.  With a sharp turn I went the other way and sent my friends running to let me know when it was clear to exit and of course they wanted to check him out.  We just didn't click and since I still receive emails from him and a notice that he is following me on twitter (no, I don't use it) I felt I should let it ride...  Whew!!

Alright I'm going to do some editing and get those funny date stories to you!  

Breathe Right strip, why do you torment me?

In order to help with my snoring, thank you Deviated Septum.  I have been wearing a breathe right strip at night.  This has not worked out as well as I have wanted.  In my sleep I take them off.  I would not recommend the clear strips as they are hard to find.  Here's a list of where I have found them the next day.

1. my hair

2. stuck to the side of my face

3. stuck to my arm

4. on the outside of my purse (I keep my pocketbook by my bed like any good old lady)

5. stuck to my pillow case (hard to find)

6. inside my purse

7. stuck to the sheet

I'm sure I'll have more to add and there are still a few I haven't found.  I know a couple had to have gotten washed which means they are permanently stuck to the sheets.  Oh, well I guess I need to get my DS fixed but then what would I write about??

victim #4- relationship gone sour

Victim 4- relationship gone sour

I did meet someone on line and we dated for 6 months.  I, wanting a relationship, let it go that long when in fact it should have ended after about 3 months.  Everything seemed fine until my dad passed away.  My dad walked into the emergency room one day and passed away the next.  Very sudden.  Very heartbreaking.  When i called to tell him my dad was in the hospital and it didn’t look good he decided to stay home and would come see me the next day.  My mom and I stayed the night at the hospital and the next morning he came and took me home to take a shower.  He was in the hospital all of 20 minutes.  When we got back to the hospital he dropped me off in the parking lot, told me he loved me but that hospitals freaked him out and he didn’t want to come in.  Like anyone enjoys them under the circumstances...  I didn’t care at that point.  If I couldn’t be a priority then I didn’t want him there.  Needless to say the next time I saw him was after my dad had passed.   He couldn’t even be there for me when I needed him.  I will give him credit he did have my cousin and her husband go with him to get clothes for the funeral and he stayed with me the whole time during the viewing.  However, I had to nudge him right before the service started as he was dozing off.  After my father passed away he started distancing himself.  Which hurt since you should want to take care of the one you love.  Instead he started calling at the last minute and backing out on  plans or just not show up.  No phone call, nothing...  I took this for another 3 months, I know, what kind of fool was I.  I realized this was not the life I wanted.  He would rather go home and sit on his couch than see me cause his house was closer.  He didn’t invite me to come over, just cancel.  He truly broke my heart.  I thought he was the one and sadly tried to make it real.  After not seeing each other for 2 weeks he was to come over and hang out.  We had talked during the day and all was good then on my way home he calls to say he’s going to bail on me and go home.  I asked why?  “My house is closer”.  Ouch!  To say i was upset is putting it mildly.  You say you love me yet you don’t want to be with me.  It was so embarrassing to have friends over and they ask where he was and all I could say was “I don’t know”.  I had had enough.  I was becoming the only person in the relationship and that’s not right.  So after some arguing and crying I decided to look on line where we met.  Low and behold guess who I find has put their profile back on there.  I called him and told him his things would be outside if he wanted them.  He acted all shocked, he couldn’t believe I was ending it.  he didn’t come and get his things so in the garbage they went.  A month later I was laying in bed feeling sorry for myself and emailed him.  We corresponded for a while in email then he called one day and asked if I wanted to get together.  I’m thinking to talk about things.  No, he thought we would just jump back into a relationship.  Hello!!  He said he had been trying to get them to remove his profile on line for a couple of days when i found it.  First, you have to put yourself on there.  Second, you have to remove yourself.  The on line service does not just slap your profile up again.  I told him this.  I also said I wanted to talk before we just went out.  He didn’t know what we had to talk about.  I let loose all the frustration I had been feeling for so long.  We haven’t spoken since.  Lesson learned.  Before you start a relationship you end the one you’re in.  I asked him several times if he was sure he wanted to be with me. He said yes, but his actions said differently.  I guess because I didn’t need him to pay my bills or work on my car he didn’t feel needed enough.  I don’t need a man, I want a good man.  So ladies, don’t put up with shit unless you are prepared to endure it for life.  I’m still waiting on my happy ending, which I would rather do than be in a miserable relationship not knowing if he’s going to show up or not.  SAY NO TO DRAMA!